Loneliness can hide well. We don’t always recognize when we’re becoming disconnected from the people around us. Still, a little kindness and compassion from someone else can help break through that feeling and guide us back toward happiness. Developing emotional intelligence also helps us notice our own emotions and recognize when someone close to us may be struggling.
1.
One of my friends, let’s say Anne, bought a Persian rug from another friend, Barbara, at Barbara’s garage sale. Barbara was short on funds.
Barbara said something like, “The rug is $10. If you don’t want it, it’s going to the dump.” Anne didn’t really have a use for the threadbare, filthy rug that had some holes, but she bought it to help her friend.
Anne cleaned it up with Tide and the garden hose on the driveway. When it dried she put it over the fitted carpet in her living room to store it, while she decided what to do with it.
About this time Anne bought a lovely Persian rug from a dealer in a nearby city. When he delivered her new carpet he offered her $300 for the rug that she had bought from Barbara. Anne immediately took the $300 in cash, and gave $290 to Barbara. Anne’s only regret was that she was so astonished that she didn’t try to get a bit more for the carpet.
2.
I was so broke and working 14 hours a day without any day off, but I still couldn’t even afford decent meals. The lady I was seeing at the time came over to my place every weekend with lot of groceries (even though I was at work).
I’d come home, open my fridge, and see all the lunch and dinner prepared for the week.
She’s now my wife.
3.
My husband was given one of those fake $10K winning lottery tickets as a prank by a friend. After he scratched it off and saw that he had won, he handed the ticket back to our friend and said, “Dennis, This is your ticket.”
We were poor, but Dennis was picking through trash for stuff to sell (on a bike) and raising 3 teen boys.
4.
After Grandpa passed, our family basically stopped getting together. Everyone was grieving differently, and the worst part was the loneliness. We all missed each other but were too stubborn to admit it.
Then Grandma announced she wanted a big birthday dinner. I honestly expected the entire thing to become a disaster, but she had a plan. Her kindness and emotional intelligence opened a door everyone else was too proud to touch.
When we arrived, she gave every person a handwritten note. Each note contained a memory about that person. Mine was about the time I helped her plant flowers as a child.
My mother’s note described how she had cared for the family during difficult years. Even my aunt, who was angry with almost everyone, started crying when she read her note.
5.
My mom used to call me every day, but the calls stopped after she retired. I became worried. I drove to her house and found her sitting alone in the living room. She looked embarrassed. “I don’t know what to do with myself anymore,” she admitted.
For years, her work had given her routine and purpose. Without it, loneliness arrived much faster than she expected. I suggested hobbies, but she rejected all of them. I suggested meeting friends, but she said everyone was busy.
Then I realized I was trying to solve the problem instead of showing compassion, so I changed my approach. I asked her to teach me one of her recipes, and she immediately became interested. The next weekend, we cooked together. Then my sister joined us. Soon we had regular Sunday dinners.
Mom began teaching my nieces and nephews how to cook too. Her happiness started returning. My sister suggested volunteering at a community kitchen, Mom laughed and said, “Why not!”
6.
I’m having issues carrying a pregnancy to term. Three different friends of ours have come up to either my husband or myself and told us that they’ve discussed it with their families and have offered to be gestational surrogates for us.
It makes me cry just to think that there are people who are willing to do that for us.
7.
My son was devastated when his grandmother forgot his birthday. He had spent the entire day waiting for her call. When evening came, he threw his phone on the couch and said, “I don’t care anymore!”
I called my mother and asked what had happened. She sounded confused. Then she admitted she had been forgetting things lately. She had missed appointments and misplaced important documents.
I became worried. A few weeks later, Mom received a medical diagnosis that explained her memory problems.
My son felt terrible. He’s always been a sensitive boy with high emotional intelligence for his age. He apologized to her, and she cried and hugged him. He even made little reminder cards and stuck them around her house.
8.
My husband’s younger brother showed up at our house with two bags. He lost his apartment after falling behind on rent. I was nervous about letting another adult move into our small home. We already had two children. Still, my husband asked me to give him a chance.
He spent most of his time in the guest room. I began leaving dinner for him even when he didn’t join us. That small kindness eventually brought him downstairs. He started playing board games with the kids. Then he helped my husband repair the backyard fence.
Our family had shown him compassion, but he gave it back in ways none of us expected, because a few days later, my husband was injured at work. His brother started working overtime and contributed to the household without being asked.
9.
I was at work and a lady asked me for a dollar, I only had $20 bills so I gave her one. When she saw it, she started crying and gave me a hug because she hadn’t eaten all day and was able to get some food and take the bus home.
She said no one has ever been that generous to her.
10.
A month before my wedding, my 77 YO grandma suddenly told me she wasn’t coming. My grandma had always been one of the people I was closest to, so hearing her say she wouldn’t be there broke my heart. When I asked why, she wouldn’t give me a straight answer and instead asked me to postpone the wedding. I refused.
2 days later, I came home and found my fiancé sitting with her. I went numb when I overheard her say, “Her mother told me I can’t come unless I lose weight. She said I have thirty days to do it, but at my age, that’s impossible. Please, take this ring and give it to her on the wedding day.”
Grandma said she didn’t want to ruin my relationship with my mother or cause a scene before my wedding, so she chose not to tell me. I walked into the room. She immediately knew I had heard everything.
I told her she never had to change her body to be welcome at my wedding. Grandma looked terrified, but relieved. The next day, I confronted my mom and made her apologize. It was my wedding, not hers.
On the big day, my grandma gave me the heirloom ring herself. I asked her whether she was sure. She just said, “Honey, you getting married brought me more happiness than any trinket ever could.”